i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
