afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
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