There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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