so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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