White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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