OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
