it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Bring me that man meat
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
