we have officially lost it.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize