Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
