I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
