I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
