u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
