WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize