Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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