dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
