it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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