Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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