we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Oh god it's open bar.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
