We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
