I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
nutella sex= disaster
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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