google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
