Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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