they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
