big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
