Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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