doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
