can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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