distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
