playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
