just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
