new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
