so explain again why im purple
no
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
