so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
