At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
