I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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