And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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