Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
The beer is more important than you right now.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
