Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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