I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize