home. puking in laundry basket.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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