And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize