3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
