CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Enjoy the penises
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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