i don't like sucking hair
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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