Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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