Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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