I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
