I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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