he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize