if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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