Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize