That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
